Liz update 15 - 5th September 2008 - The Final Chapter

Elizabeth Jane Bennett 1943 – 2008 Too young to leave us

After several lengthy conversations with the hospice palliative care nurses regarding moving Liz from the hospital into a hospice environment, it was decided that the most appropriate course of action to ensure the best care for her was to get her moved into a private room at the hospital. We made it very clear that due to Liz’s rapid deterioration we expected this to happen sooner rather than later but fully understood the difficulties and practicalities. This we achieved thanks to our palliative nurse from the hospital and the sister on the hospital ward at approximately 3pm after already being moved at 5:15am from the emergency medical unit to a normal Ward.

Liz deteriorated rapidly during the day (Friday), but was never in any physical pain although the mental anguish over the past few days must have been appalling.

I had decided to stay the night with Liz at the hospital but at about 8.00pm it became clear that things had worsened considerably and that she was unlikely to last through the night.

I called Julian & Tim back to the hospital (with Liz’s wig) so that we could all be with her and say goodbye together. Throughout the evening she was still very aware of what was going on around her, and at her request she even tried (unsuccessfully) to get out of bed to use the commode. Unfortunately she didn’t make it as all her strength had gone.

However she was still responding to questions and comments, but by 10pm her breathing had become very difficult, so a low level morphine drip was given to relieve the stress and tension she was experiencing. This immediately allowed her breathing to improve and meant that she was able to breathe easily without oxygen for the first time in several hours.

Over the next 20 minutes she just quietly and very peacefully drifted away, with all three of us holding her. She had a wonderful complexion and even the nurses commented on how good she looked and in particular her wonderful skin (courtesy of many years of Lancôme!).

Liz quietly passed away at 10.25pm

I will miss her desperately as will Tim, Julian and their families. It is so sad that she has died so young and will not see our grandchildren grow up or be at Julian’s wedding later in the year.

All our dreams and things we have worked towards for nearly 39 years have now gone. In retirement we planned to travel extensively, visit the big opera houses, spend more time in our garden, become more involved in the local community and in particular see more of the boys and their families.

Liz couldn’t believe how kind and supportive everyone has been. On behalf of Liz a big thank you for all your flowers, words of comfort and support over the past nine months, without which life would have been much more difficult.

After nine months of numerous injections, blood samples, invasive investigations, scans, hospital stays, blood clots, diet limitations, blood transfusions, fluid drainage, visits to the surgery and extensive medications she never once complained. In fact she kept saying that apart from the adverse effects of the chemotherapy she could not believe that she had cancer, and that many other people were in a far worse situation than her. Thankfully this has now all come to end relatively quickly and peacefully. Finally she is now at peace.

We will circulate details of Liz’s funeral arrangements in due course, but request no flowers. If wished, donations in lieu of flowers can be sent to a nominated charity, details of which will be circulated.

Thank you for your support.

Dick, Julian, Tim and Liz.